Saturday, September 02, 2006

futsal

After correction from native speaker
Yesterday, I played futsal despite my son having a high fever. Don't blame me. We don't have many players. Although we need at least 5 players for each team, we started to play the game with 9 players because it was just an intra-squad game. I got 3 goals in this practice match. I could take a rest even when I played. When I was exhausted, I played as a Goal Keeper. We will play a game against another team 2 weeks later. I don't have much stamina and skill, so I will be a benchwarmer. But futsal's rules allow us to change players lots even after going out of the game. I'll have a chance to play in the game. This will be my first game.

Original Diary
Yesterday, I played futsal despite my son had high fever. Don't blame me. We don't have many players. Although we need at least 5 players for each team, we started to play game with 9 players because it was just a intra-squad game. I got 3 goals in this practice match. I could take a rest even when I played. When I exhausted, I played as a Goal Keeper. We will play game against another team 2 weeks later. I don't have much stamina and skill, so I will be benchwarmer. But futsal rule allows to change players lots even after out of the game. I have a chance to play in the game. This will be my first game.

2 Comments:

At 9/02/2006 12:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi JoJo-san,
It's my first visit here. I always enjoy reading your comments over at Kiyo-san's blog.

You asked if someone could revise your grammar. I'll try. If you have any questions about my changes, please ask and I'll attempt to explain them.

I'll make any changes bold.

"Yesterday, I played futsal despite my son having a high fever. Don't blame me. We don't have many players. Although we need at least 5 players for each team, we started to play the game with 9 players because it was just an intra-squad game. I got 3 goals in this practice match. I could take a rest even when I played. When I was exhausted, I played as a Goal Keeper. We will play a game against another team 2 weeks later. I don't have much stamina and skill, so I will be a benchwarmer. But futsal's rules allow us to change players lots even after going out of the game. I'll have a chance to play in the game. This will be my first game."

Good job, JoJo-san! I mostly just had to add a couple small things. Knowing when to use "a" is very difficult. I think Kiyo-san is reading an entire book devoted to that topic.

Also, "a" becomes "an" in front of a word which begins with a vowel sound, such as "intra-squad".

"despite my son having" instead of "despite my son had" is hard to explain. I think I'll have to ask my friend who works as a newspaper editor for advice about why we say it that way. For some reason, when we use "despite" or "in spite of", we usually use -ing words instead of past tense. I'm not sure why, though. Strange, isn't it? I've learned English my whole life, yet I don't understand everything about how it works. At least not on a conscious level.

 
At 9/02/2006 5:06 PM, Blogger JoJo said...

I really appreciate your kind attention. It is very rare for this blog to be corrected by native speakers or English specialists. If you don't mind, please tell me your nickname or handle name.

 

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